Saturday, May 28, 2011

A Day of Dreams

Serenity. That would be the word I would use to sum up this day. I enjoyed a day that felt as if it took little to no effort to complete the to do’s. Freeing up time for me to RELAX. Don’t get me wrong there were some moments of opposition but my God surrounded me. I only knew peace and joy today. Blissful.

I enjoyed time one on one with each of my Bees today. Something I really want to do more often. They deserve it. Everyone took a nap today! No bickering. Dinner came together in no time effortlessly. Today was beautiful.

Through all the bliss, my heart was longing. I wanted to go home. Not in the physical sense like back to North Carolina, but I truly pondered the environment in which my Bees will grow up. I thought Philly would be a place of opportunity, a place of diversity and culture that we can grow and explore as a family. However after being honest with myself, I was driven here by fear. I feared we couldn’t remain employed in a manufacturing town. I feared the children will miss out on a good education.

Now after coming to a place in my faith where I can trust God for EVERYTHING. I know that I’m blessed in the city and the field. My location does not dictate His provisions and with that in mind I can truly be free to be me. I can dream my dreams and not conform to what others’ lives look like or what my conscious says is the most strategic thing to do.

Today me longed to be south. I want leave the concrete and buildings for greenery and spaces. I want to slow down from the hustle and bustle of the city and just coast the countryside. Am I moving anytime soon…no. But now I am open to whatever God has in store for me and I feel like He is whispering, “home”.

I hear Him, this past week I have been putting in a lot effort in creating a home. Creating an environment that God can dwell and we can grow and be restored. Physically, yes I do want it to be beautiful and functional but more importantly I want His presence here. It’s been driving me this week to create this environment.
So after a great day with family and bubbling on the inside to do more in my home. I read this post by T.D. Jakes via facebook:

“You are here for a reason. You’re a dreamer. It is impossible to be a dreamer and keep your dream hidden. While you may feel like you are a long way from the fulfillment of the thing for which you hope, remember that you are evolving; you are a dream in progress. Refuse to give up on your dream and instead learn to appreciate the process of “becoming."

It resonated deeply with in me. I feel like dreams buried from long ago are reemerging, stronger and more vivid. There’s something God is doing right now and I have to trust Him to get there. But I tell you this, my heart is ready to go! Maybe that’s why my devotional has been stuck in Hebrews this week. I need to exercise and build my faith. I am. I will continue. I’m ready for whatever with God leading.

Be blessed. Be a blessing. Enjoy this weekend and remember to the veterans that sacrificed their life so that we can live our dreams.

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